Setting boundaries means you know what you need and you’re able to effectively communicate it to others.
It means you’re aware of what kind of words and behavior is acceptable and unacceptable, and you let other people know your limits, so that you don’t feel disrespected, manipulated and taken advantage of.
I’m passionate about boundaries because I know what it’s like to live without them. I know what it’s like to have a selfless nature and ignore your own needs to the point of feeling completely depleted.
The truth is, it’s our responsibility to set and hold boundaries. …
Over the past few months, I’ve noticed how much time I spend worrying about disappointing others — particularly my family.
What will they think? Will they support me? Will they approve my choices? Will they understand my perspective? Am I going to let them down?
I realized that my fear of disappointing people has its roots in my childhood. As a child, I felt unloved and unaccepted whenever I disappointed my parents. I’d only feel loved when I’d follow their rules and act according to their standards and expectations.
I eventually learned that it was my duty to please everyone…
Many of us have developed an identity, a role that we continuously play in order to be accepted and stay in our comfort zone. Unfortunately, we rarely stop to question if this role is really who we are.
What most of us don’t know, or try to ignore, is that our true self is right beneath the surface, waiting for us to wake up.
Our true self doesn’t care about others’ expectation, or about what society considers to be normal. It just wants us to grow and flourish. …
Push-pull relationships are unstable, uncertain and unpredictable — and also incredibly common.
One day your partner tells you how much they love you, how amazing you are and everything’s running smoothly. Then they start getting distant and you can’t understand what’s going wrong.
I’ve experienced this emotional roller coaster for many years and I know how miserable it can make you feel.
Now that I’m in a secure relationship, it’s clear to me that the main reason why I kept attracting such unstable dynamics was that, on a subconscious level, I believed that was how love was supposed to be…
Expressions like push-pull and hot-and-cold are often used to describe the unstable, repetitive cycles that characterize trauma bonded relationships.
These relationships are much more common than we think. In fact, I’d say they’ve become the norm — the problem is, we live in a society that normalizes these patterns instead of viewing them as toxic or unhealthy.
Besides, it can be incredibly difficult to spot red flags if these red flags have always been your life.
How can you know how secure love feels like, if you’ve never had it before? How can you expect relationships to be a safe…
When your healing journey first begins, you have no idea what a healing journey is. All you know is there’s something missing within you and you need to find it.
Usually, what’s missing is your authentic self.
A healing journey takes you back to who you were before you were conditioned to act and think a certain way. It takes you back to your true desires, needs and ambitions — with no filter or social expectations.
However, in order to find your authentic self, you first have to let your old self die. You have to ignore the external noise…
Many of us associate codependency with clinginess, but it’s something much deeper than that. In fact, I used to be codependent and I was the exact opposite of clingy.
You can be codependent and appear to be a confident individual who has it all figured out when, deep down, you struggle with trusting yourself, loving yourself, and attracting healthy, uplifting relationships.
This is because codependency is a pattern you absorb unconsciously, not a trait you consciously have. It conditions you in every sphere of your life.
Codependency stems from growing up in enmeshed families where our individuality is not valued…
When, after years of mental and emotional abuse, we finally realize the depth of what we’ve been through, our whole life changes.
We feel seen. We feel understood. We feel validated. Most importantly, we feel like we finally have a name for the torture we’ve been subjected to. Narcissism. Narcissistic abuse.
We now realize that we were never crazy for thinking there was something wrong with this person — our partner, our mother, our boss, our father — who would always find a way to make us feel miserable.
However, there’s also the empathetic, naive voice inside us that keeps…
If you’re anything like me, you know how difficult it is to set and hold boundaries. Your people-pleasing patterns get in the way and you end up saying yes to everything just to keep the peace.
Well, that’s exactly why they’re so important.
Boundaries are the ultimate form of self-care. They allow you to fully express yourself and make sure your needs are being met. Without them, you keep giving and giving and giving without ever giving to yourself first.
Because the sad truth is, nobody will respect your boundaries if you don’t set them in the first place.
A dark night of the the soul is defined as a spiritual journey that forces you to shed previous beliefs, habits and relationships, so that you can make the transition to a more mindful, fulfilling life.
It shakes every aspect of your life. It makes you question every aspect of your existence. Basically, it drives you nuts.
The good news is, there’s a purpose behind it. I’ve been going through my own dark night of the soul for over a year now, and no matter how painful it has been, I can say with confidence that I needed it. I…